are you stupid or just a little slow ?

i iwsh i had qualities like sympathy . fidelity . sobriety . sincerity . instead i got lunacy . i wish i could fit myself to a rocket and send myself to outer face . i wish my life was a little less seedy . why am i always so greedy? . i wish my life was not so boring . it would be overkill. i wish i could apologise . be dignified . wish i could look you in the eye . and tell you that i never lied . i wish that i could stop the cries. don't wake me up today . wjere i wanna stay . don't wanna come out to play. doesn't matter what you say. anyway. i wish i didn't smoke so many cigarettes.

so many things about myself that i despise . so many things about my life that i despise . so many things that i despise.